May 29: The smell of ocean air wafting up into our flat. The view of powerful waves crashing on the beach. The heat from the sun’s strong rays heating the balcony floor on which my feet stand, so cozy, so deliciously toasty. All of our windows and doors open to take in the beautiful weather. A deep breath in and then out. This is experiencing paradise.
As I sit here enjoying our paradise, writing, the sound of Jonah’s chattering slowly turns to quiet mumbling. I think he’s asleep and then another muffled sentence or two. And now silence. The sounds crackling out of the monitor are the most wonderful sounds I’ve ever heard. Quite smitten with him, my adoration growing daily it seems. He certainly has his moments, as any child does, but for the most part, I look at Jonah with such wonderment. I still can’t believe he’s our son, this little guy who is blossoming into an independent person of his own. Jeremy and I smile at each other constantly as we hear his latest quips or watch him turn some seemingly uninteresting object into a car or train or bus that comes to life with motor sounds and that stops to let us onboard. The moment I could just squeeze him the most might be when something has gotten him excited, and he scurries around, waving his hands in the air, talking in rapid fire about what he’s going to do or see or find. It is truly the most amazing experience to watch Jonah grow and develop.
In the last couple of weeks, we’ve mostly done more of the same. Sounds humdrum, but when “the same” means living this life, here, it’s pretty hard to beat. We’ve had some adventures, we’ve gone to the beach and various playgrounds with Dom and Charlotte, we’ve had a good friend visit, we’ve had lovely outings with Doris, and we’ve done most of this in nice weather.
Two weeks ago Monday was predicted to be gray and wet, but we woke up to beautiful weather. Jonah and I had planned to go to the promenade along the beach, but Dom texted me to see if we wanted to join her and Charlotte at a little beach nearby. Turned out to be a great cove right around the corner from our place—literally a three minute drive—where the water laps in, its roughness tamed by the large boulders protecting the cove. Jonah and I built sand castles and cakes until Dom and Charlotte arrived.Then it was exploring time. Jonah and Charlotte walked around, picked up shells, checked out the sea snails,
sat in some type of kayak owned by residents of one of the beautiful houses situated right above the sand. Jonah, of course, didn’t want to get out of the kayak and insisted that Charlotte get back in when she’d had her fill of it. By noon, the weather quickly turned cloudy, so we skedaddled home. After Jonah’s nap, Jeremy, Jonah, and I went for a walk in the same area where we’d been in the morning. The sunset was fabulous.On Tuesday, Jonah and I met Dom and Charlotte by the Mouille Point Lighthouse, where there’s a big wood play structure and other playground amenities. Jonah and Charlotte climbed around the structure for a little while until Jonah spotted the rundown play area on the other side of a fence, alongside a little train. Jonah wanted to check out the “house” in the neighboring play area, so off we ventured.
We decided to take a quick ride on the little train first. It circled the enclosed play area, taking about 8 minutes or so to make a complete loop. A large group of young school kids from a nearby township— Khayelitsha—had come to spend part of the day playing in the area. The older white guys, who it seemed were sponsoring this outing for the kids through a civic organization, invited us to ride the train with the little kids. One guy made some comment about how the kids would love to have us onboard as well. I can’t quite recall exactly what he said, but Dom and I both felt like the take away point was that these guys would be able to say to whomever, “Oh, the kids even interacted with some white people.” I know that sounds crass, but that’s how it seemed. Made me feel really uncomfortable, creepy, like I was part of some charade. There is no real integration here!Anyway, the train seemed like it would be a hit with Jonah and Charlotte. It was, after coaxing them to get on. Charlotte was more focused on the balloons hanging from the train outside, and Jonah was oddly more interested in getting over to what he thought was a house on a play structure but was really a liability-in-waiting with nails protruding from the posts, rickety steps, and lead-exposure-central with cracking paint (time of last paint job, circa 1960). Once on the train, the kids were happy. The train started up, and that’s when Dom and I cringed. The train was SO loud! That experience certainly took off a year of living hearing-aid free, when that time comes.
To top it off, as we rounded the final bend to get back to the starting point, the train couldn’t get over the slight incline with everyone on it. So the train stopped, the teachers/sponsors/do-gooders came over and helped most of the little kids off the train and down the tracks to the platform. Dom and I thought for sure that this was the end of our journey, but no, the train went around two more times, while we groaned. From the train, we headed over to the dilapidated play area. When it became clear to Jonah that he couldn’t go up into the house of horrors, he turned two u-shaped concrete walls (presumably for climbing?) into a house and then a car.We enjoyed lunch at Café Neo across the street. Before our food came, Jonah and Charlotte were served babychinoes. This is apparently the hip drink for kids, served all over South Africa. A babychino is made with whipped milk and put into a little mug, just the right size for little hands to hold, with a tiny bit of chocolate powder sprinkled on top. “More babychino,” Jonah kept saying. Jonah loved his babychino. He started by eating the foam with a spoon and then clasping the mug to drink the remaining milk. Really, really cute.
Jonah decided not to nap, so Jeremy, Jonah, and I went for a walk, ran errands in Camps Bay, and walked the length of the commercial district to see what else was in our neighborhood.
They say that sleep begets sleep, and it certainly does for Jonah. No nap on Tuesday helped create the situation that arose at 3:45 am, that is, when Jonah arose and decided not to go back to sleep. His coughing woke him up initially, and I suppose he decided he’d had enough sleep. Perhaps he decided it was morning, despite my pleas to him otherwise. I sat with him in his room for an hour before waking up Jeremy to do a shift. Jonah wasn’t pleased with the rotation and only allowed Jeremy to stay for 30 minutes before I had to return. Then I was on duty until 6:10 am, when I told Jonah that it was time to get daddy and dress for the day. Oy, that was not a fun morning. Add to that the stomach ache I’d had for the past day (lasted about four days, never figured out what that was all about), and I was a wreck on Wednesday. Quite surprisingly, Jonah was in a great mood all morning, playing, laughing, talking up a storm.
We were all supposed to go see Doris that day and take her to run some errands, but it was clear Jonah would need a good, early nap (me too!), so Jonah and I stayed behind. Caffeine isn’t exactly ideal for a funny tummy, but the alternative—not being able to function at all—required it. Jonah and I walked to Paranga on the main strip in Camps Bay, where we sat and enjoyed a café latte, milk, and croissant. We perched ourselves on a couch-like seat, sitting side by side, both of us facing the ocean. Jonah was such a big boy sitting there. The seat was high enough that he didn’t need a high chair or booster, and he loved being able to sit right alongside me.
From Paranga, we walked over to the nearby playground at Camps Bay Park, where Jonah loved running on the huge wood play structure. It isn’t quite suited for his age (size, really), so I had to follow him around like a hawk, helping him with his footing from below to navigate a balance beam bridge, tire bridge, and high platforms. Not too restful for me, but he absolutely loved it.We headed home for a quick lunch. Jonah was in bed by 12:30 pm. When I first put him in, he was so chatty, loud, and then, total silence five minutes later. He slept until after 4 pm, and I slept for a couple hours myself. After his nap, Jonah played on the balcony with his pitchers and water.
Jeremy had a good day with Doris, working through her financial situation with her, talking through assisted living options, taking her to visit a care facility, and then taking her grocery shopping. It’s quite fascinating that everyone thinks Doris works for us or worked as Jeremy’s nanny at one time. At the care facility, the woman whom they talked to about the place asked Jeremy (when Doris was using the bathroom) how long Doris had been his nanny. And then at the supermarket that day, with Doris’s basket overflowing with food and other essentials, the guys working in the vegetable section asked her what that was all about (seeing Jeremy with her and a ton of food in her cart). When we were at Blues for lunch on Mother’s Day, a waitress apparently said to Doris that she had nice employers. On the one hand, it’s sad that the assumption is always that Doris is our employee rather than a friend or someone else important in our lives. On the other hand, people wouldn’t assume her employers were doing nice things for her if this didn’t actually happen, people taking care of people who work or worked for them.
The next day, Jeremy needed the car to drive over to the University of Cape Town in Rondebosch to give a talk. He dropped Jonah and me off at the waterfront to meet Jessica, so she could take us to an NGO (called Philani) in Khayelitsha that produces and sells beautiful crafts. Jessica had some idea of how to get there, but it ultimately took us an hour and a half to find our way to a place that was only a twenty minute ride away. From the N2 freeway, we got on some road that took us all the way to Mitchells Plain in one direction and then however many miles out of the way in the other direction. We finally discovered that there was no way to get onto the road we wanted directly from the highway on which we were driving, so we had to take a fairly circuitous route to make our way into Khayelitsha.
We didn’t know where to go once we were in the township, so we stopped at a gas station to get directions on how to find the specific address. The first guy we talked to gave us some idea; the next guy called that guy back over along with another guy, and the three of them discussed the situation for a bit before starting to give us more detailed directions. Then a bunch of guys across the street got involved, and the next thing we know a woman was coming over to get in our car to show us the way. She needed to be dropped off some place by the NGO anyway, so it worked out fine. Very nice woman who turned out to be a chef at The Africa Café.
Jessica hung out with Jonah while I looked around the NGO’s store, bought several bags and a couple of wall hangings (one of a big elephant to go in Jonah’s room when we return). The NGO does great work, providing nutrition information and monitoring for children in the community. The women who weave the rugs and bags bring their kids to work, where they either go to school or attend day care at the NGO. It was an easy trip back home, a late nap, and more water play in the afternoon.Jessica came back over to our place at night to watch Jonah so that Jeremy and I could go out to dinner for Jeremy’s birthday. We had a delicious dinner at Savoy Cabbage in the city center. How nice to enjoy a meal at our own pace!
The next morning, Friday morning, we found ourselves in the midst of a major storm. The storm had started the night before, although the rain was intermittent. Heavy winds were on and off. The ocean looked amazing, so fierce, so on guard. Jonah and I picked up Dom and Charlotte to go to Plinka Plonka, an indoor play area Rob had taken Charlotte to the day before. Having gone past their house and not able to go back a one-way street, I had to pull over for them to get to our car. As I was doing so, Jonah said, “It’s fine. It’s fine.” I turned around and inquired, “What’s fine? Where I’ve parked?” “Yes, that’s good, mommy,” Jonah replied, letting me know that I was at a good place to stop the car. Whenever Jeremy or I give each other driving assistance, our little parrot, Jonah, is always there to tell us to do whatever it is that we’ve been asked to do by each other. And he apparently gives out his own orders as well.
Anyhoo, Plinka Plonka, it not only has a great name, but it’s a great indoor play area. Jonah was happy to do his own thing, going from little scooting car to the house with its kitchen, where he mostly cooked and washed the dishes (dang, I’m training him well!!). Dom and I sat and had coffee/hot chocolate and grilled cheese sandwiches. Charlotte came and went from the little food area. I had to keep poking my head in the house to make sure Jonah’s silence was only a sign of his still being busy at work. It was great fun, relaxing and really good to hang out with Dom without having to follow Jonah every which way.That afternoon I took for myself to walk along Long Street in the city center. Lined with trendy shops, cafés, antique and vintage clothing stores, music and book stores, Long Street is a great place to walk and take in the scene. I started at the end closest to the waterfront, finding my way to the South African Missionary Meeting-House Museum, site of the first missionary church in the country. The museum boasts a Neoclassical wood pulpit from which Reverend Vos presumably preached Christianity to slaves in the early 19th century.
After reading a bit about the history of the church and the South African Missionary Society, I made my way in and out of various stores along Long Street, looking at antique china, old books, used clothing, beautiful African crafts, and then checking out some uber-chic gift stores. Most of the stores have security gates through which you need to be buzzed in for entry. I did try on a cute pair of jeans at a surf shop and a few hats too, but I couldn’t bring myself to even go into the trendiest of clothes stores because I’m not prepared to scrap my entire wardrobe to play the part of hipster mom. As Dominique said to me earlier that day in reference to herself, I think I’ve used Jonah as the excuse for why I just can’t bother to do my hair, or to put an outfit together that includes something more interesting than a fleece and jeans, or to find the right necklace to match the bracelet to match the earrings (which I haven’t worn in perhaps a decade now). The reality is that I never did any of those things before he came along! Maybe I tried a teeny tiny harder. As Jonah’s story character Corduroy would say, I think I wish I were that person, but I’m just not. I just don’t have the interest when push comes to shove. I’d rather sit for two minutes longer holding my cup of coffee or laying in bed or letting the hot water run down my back in the shower (bad environmentalist!) or, or, or…After a couple of hours, I remembered that I needed to find Doris a birthday gift. Considering that the stores were way too cool for me, there was no way I was finding a birthday gift for a woman turning seventy-five years old. Doris probably wasn’t interested in a wallet made from recycled magazines or 1920s high-heeled shoes with rhinestones. Walking past a store, I thought of the perfect gift for someone who plans to move out of her house into a smaller space and doesn’t need more stuff to move with her or get rid of—a new purse! I recalled that her current purse looked a bit worn and thought it was one she’d probably had for a while. What better frivolous gift to give someone who’d never buy such a thing for herself? So I got in my car and zipped over to Gardens Shopping Center, where I did not find one store that carried a purse suitable for a 75-year-old woman. After a quick stop at a café for a piece of apple pie and a decaf café latte with hazelnut flavoring, I did some grocery shopping and went home. Jonah was in a great mood that afternoon and evening and didn’t seem ready to go to sleep until close to 8 pm. He slept in our room that night because our friend Malala was going to be showing up from Johannesburg for the weekend after Jonah was asleep. We stayed up to greet Malala and all crashed at about 11 pm.
The storm continued on Saturday. It was a very wet day, although not too cold (except during the heavy periods of rain). I had the men drop me off at the V&A Waterfront so I could look for a purse for Doris, while they went and picked her up. I found nothing in the department stores, but eventually I found a few I really liked at Nine West. I didn’t know which one to get, so I put three on hold (all sale items so purchases were final). I didn’t want to run the risk of getting one that Doris wasn’t going to like. At first Doris didn’t seem too excited about the idea of a new purse, but I told her she needed to see them first and then she could decide. Once she saw the bags, she was thrilled! She actually picked the one I liked best (and had almost bought until I realized I couldn’t return it). The next day she reported to us that as soon as she got home, she switched purses and tried it out for different types of outings: would her bible fit in it for church (check), would her papers fit in it for this appointment or that one (check), and so on. She’s so funny, she even joked about doing a burial ceremony for the bag she was retiring, which she’d had to sew more than a dozen times as the inner lining tore over the years.
After walking around a bit more, we headed to lunch, where Jonah sat for over an hour and a half, eating butternut squash soup, samosas, and corn on the cob (which kept him occupied for a very looooooooooong time). At lunch, Jonah kept making funny noises—something like “meep” or “eeeeh”—and I asked him what he was doing. He said, “I honking my nose,” although he didn’t have his hand on his nose. They dropped Jonah and me off at the house for Jonah to take a nap, which he didn’t do. So it goes.
The next day, Granny Doris’s birthday, we picked Doris up and headed to Hermanus, a coastal town situated by an inlet whose protective cove attracts calving whales. We didn’t see any whales, but the views of the ocean were spectacular, especially with the wild waves caused by the storm system. It was so windy outside (note the hair) but so beautiful. 
We parked to take in the beauty, while Doris stayed in the car. After about three minutes outside, Jonah wanted back in the car so he could drive. So we put Jonah in and went to the viewing spot, while Doris and Jonah “drove” around. In honor of Doris’s 75th birthday, we had a lovely lunch on a beach lagoon just west of Hermanus. Jonah decided not to nap in the car, so he crashed early that night.
Monday: the storm was still lingering, but we couldn’t exactly let the weather control our lives. I had it in my head from the night before (when it seemed that the storm system had moved through completely) that we were going to see the penguins that day. Malala’s flight wasn’t until the early evening, so we set out for Boulders Beach around 10:15 am after a leisurely morning. Jonah had slept until 7:30 am that day and the previous day as well, something about sleeping in our room with us I guess.
We drove toward Muizenberg on False Bay and down the coast, spotting a gorgeous rainbow just north of St. James. We got to Simon’s Town and decided it was too wet at that point to visit the penguins at the beach, so we went to the Simon’s Town Museum and South African Naval Museum. Jonah loved the beautiful dollhouse at our first stop (to the contrary of his father at this age who turned a dollhouse into a parking garage for his Matchbox cars), and he loved the model boats and retired ship guns, massive helicopter, and other naval equipment at our second stop.
From the museums, we grabbed a bite to eat at a restaurant on the wharf before heading to Boulder’s Beach to see the penguins. There’s a new boardwalk at the beach that runs above the sand and allows people to get closer views of the penguins without disturbing them too much. Despite the drizzle that started soon after our arrival, Jonah loved walking along the boardwalk. He thought the penguins were interesting enough, but mostly he was just happy to be running with the light drizzle falling on his face. Again, no nap in the car. We took Malala to the airport and headed home with an early bedtime that night as well. It was great to see Malala (“Lala” to Jonah), really wonderful to have him with us for a few days. For the next several days, Jonah kept asking for Lala and then reminding us that Lala had taken an airplane back home.On Tuesday, Jeremy dropped Jonah and me off at Dom and Rob’s house. Jeremy needed the car for the day to take Doris around to see a bunch of retirement homes. (All the residents of the various facilities were white, except the staff, of course, but Doris seems quite happy about moving into one. Traditionally, most blacks have their families take care of them, but Doris doesn’t have any really. Willie died last year, she lost her only child—a daughter (Vuyiswa) whose two kids live in California with their father—and she’s not close to her siblings.) Rob went off to the gym, and Dom, the kids, and I hung out at their house all morning. Jonah loved playing with new toys, particularly a tractor, a scooting car, and any other object that had wheels. It was quite relaxing, so nice to sit around and chat. It was actually a beautiful day, but we couldn’t bring ourselves to get off the couches. Dom and Charlotte dropped us off at home, and Jonah decided not to sleep AGAIN! He did stay in his bed for about an hour and a half, talking and resting. I thought the napless day was going to create a bit of a nightmare that evening because we had plans to go to dinner at the home of two professors from UCT, Nicoli and Jeremy.
This was one of those nights when Jonah surprised Jeremy and me yet again. We arrived at Nicoli and Jeremy’s beautiful home in Hout Bay, situated in the hills with lush surroundings, around 6 pm. The house would soon be full, with three dogs—two large and one medium-sized—several cats, and house guests (another UCT professor and his lovely 11th grade daughter). The dogs ran in the house, coming home from their early evening walk, and they stormed over to Jonah, who scrunched up his face and enjoyed the tongue licks and nudges immensely. Despite no nap, Jonah managed to sit at the table with us for about an hour, eating and playing with various spice containers. Particularly on this night, we were really impressed with Jonah’s ability to spend time with adults, not fidgeting to get down or making a scene. And when he was ready to get down, I explained that he needed to stay in the kitchen, which he did, until the 11th grader finished dinner and off they went around the house (playing the piano at some point, Jonah told me later). Shockingly, Jonah didn’t fall asleep in the car, but he did sleep soundly that night.
The next day, Dom and Charlotte picked us up to head to Clifton Beach #4, the Clifton beach closest to Camps Bay. It was SUCH an amazingly gorgeous day. The sun was shining, there was no wind, the temperature was comfortable. It was the perfect day for the beach, sitting in the sand, digging, hanging out. The kids roamed a bit (mostly Charlotte, I assume because Jonah was tired—he spent a good deal of time standing on my lap and throwing his arms around my neck…okay by me.) The water was too cold to go in, although I think Nana and Papa would have braved the temperature to enjoy a swim under such a sunny sky. We all were happy enough to just be on the beach. I can’t underscore how PERFECT the weather was. We got home to Hannif and Peter (guys who help maintain Paul’s properties) replacing our refrigerator, which wasn’t staying cold enough, and Margaret cleaning our apartment, so Jonah rode around on the boda boda for a while before lunch. We took a family ride on the bus-turned-train (remember the box the parking garage came in?). When either Jeremy or I tried to pretend we were driving, Jonah would tell us, “No, daddy [or mommy], you don’t have steering wheel.”We woke up Thursday morning to a phenomenal thunder and lightening storm. Jonah came in our bed, and we all sat together watching bolts of lightening strike over the water. It was amazing. Later that day, all of the local radio station hosts spent time commenting on the strange weather, the tropic-like conditions, very wet and very warm.
Dom, Rob, and Charlotte left for Durban that day, so Jonah and I were flying solo. Jonah and I went to the indoor playground, which was populated with almost all boys (about six roughly in the same age range). That day Jonah climbed up the slide on his own for the first time—not the stairs to the slide but the slide itself. He was so pleased with himself. He played in the kitchen, climbed around the play structure, joyfully landed in the balls at the bottom of the slide over and over again, and drove a little car around. A quick stop at the supermarket and, again, no nap that day. After I’d put Jonah to bed for his nap, I walked to the nearby ice cream store to get a double scoop on a cone and to watch the waves crash on the beach. A cold morning turned into a lovely afternoon. I returned to the house and sat on the balcony in a lounge chair while Jonah played with his bowls, pitchers, and pots in the water.
On Friday, Jonah and I went on one of our adventures. I’d arranged the night before to take a tour of the Bo-Kaap neighborhood in the city center. On the slopes of Signal Hill sits one of Cape Town’s oldest residential areas. Brightly colored 19th-century Dutch and Georgian houses line the streets, and mosques dot the landscape. Combined with the cobbled streets and narrow alleyways, the neighborhood is the most picturesque of the city. Collectively known as “Cape Malays”, the majority of the Bo-Kaap’s residents are Muslim descendents of dissidents and slaves brought here by the Dutch in the 16th and 17th centuries.
Jonah and I met Sharia outside the Bo-Kaap Museum, where she showed us around and talked to us for about forty-five minutes about the history of the residents and the neighborhood. We spent the next hour or so strolling along the streets of the Bo-Kaap, every passerby greeting our guide who lived not too far from the museum. I felt more like we were guests of a friend who was showing us her neighborhood than paying clients of a guide. We stopped at a little store/bakery, where Sharia bought us different types of foods typically eaten by locals (a warm samosa-like pastry and a donut-like bread with coconut sprinkles were two favorites). She helped push Jonah’s stroller so I could take pictures. We talked about the similarities between Islam and Judaism. We poked our heads in a mosque that was under renovation. It was a lovely morning and so nice to have an interesting outing.
On Saturday, we headed to Stellenbosch, about thirty miles east of Cape Town. The heart of the South African Winelands, Stellenbosch is a quaint, charming little town that is home to a major university (Stellenbosch University) but also is a hotbed of conservatism and has been called the “intellectual engine room of apartheid”. We had plans to meet Jeremy’s colleague from UCT and his family for lunch, so we decided to make a day of it. We spent a couple of hours walking around, admiring the architecture, soaking in the warm weather. Jonah strolled along, sporting his sunglasses, and was the hit of the town (or so it seemed to us).
We met up with Bob, Leanna, Frankie, and Julia in town and headed to a wine farm just outside the city. The surroundings of the wine farm were beautiful with the mountains, trees, and vineyards, particularly with the changing colors of the leaves. It’s the beginning of winter, so it was the perfect time of year to be in that part of the Cape to see the leaves turn. The wine farm itself was quite charming and very practical for parents. We sat outside on a patio under an awning for lunch, right next to a large play structure, grassy area, and fountain. Julia is three and a half, so she and Jonah were happy to be playing most of the time. In fact, Jonah wasn’t particularly interested in lunch that day. We hung out, ate, and talked. It was a very nice afternoon, finished off with an absolutely gorgeous sunset we got to enjoy on our drive home. No nap, of course, so early to bed for the little man.On Sunday, we headed over to Doris’s house in the morning. While Jeremy was inside getting Doris, a guy who rents a couple of rooms in the back of Doris’s house with his family needed to get out of the driveway. After I’d moved the car, he thanked me, “Thanks, mama.” I love that. Has happened often that someone who is black has called me “mama”. I hear Doris being called mama too. I find it quite endearing.
We headed over to Kirstenbosch National Botanical Gardens in Rondebosch,
driving through some expensive neighborhoods with their massive homes on our way there and later to the restaurant in Constantia Valley. Created in 1895 by Cecil Rhodes, the gardens contain over 22,000 indigenous plants. In 2004, it became the first botanical gardens in the world to achieve UNESCO World Heritage status. As we waited for the golf cart to pick us up for a tour, we watched the clouds melt over the mountains like ice cream melting over its cone. The phenomenon is likened to a table cloth being placed over Table Mountain. Whatever you call it, it’s stunning.
There are trails throughout the gardens, but the golf cart was going to be the easiest way for us to see the place, the only way for Doris to join us in any event. Jonah loved the ride, of course. And we got to see more than we otherwise would have been able to on foot. Jonah and I sat in the back seat of the golf car, facing the rear, with our backs to Jeremy and Doris. Jonah told the driver to “go, go!” every time he stopped to point out a plant or flower, although Jonah eventually became engrossed with the consumption of raisins.
From the gardens, we drove to lunch at the Constantia Uitsig Country Hotel, home to what’s considered one of the finest restaurants in South Africa. It was our best meal since we got here, for sure, and we’ve already had several delicious meals. Jeremy had fish, Doris and I had steak, Jonah had pasta. Usually I have the fish, Jeremy has the beef or lamb, Doris has the lamb, and Jonah always has the pasta. In any event, the view from our table was stunning with the mountains as the backdrop and vineyards, farm houses, and grazing horses in the foreground. The view alone is reason enough to eat at this place, particularly during this time of year.
On Monday, Jonah and I went to the Sea Point Promenade, the part along the beach with slides, swings, a play wagon and oxen, merry-go-round, and other climbing structures. Jonah spent most of his time on the wagon and merry-go-round. At some point, Jonah tried to push the merry-go-round. He turned to me and said, “This merry not go round.” He kept calling it “the merry”. Later, after collecting some rocks, he said, “I put these on the merry.” While collecting rocks, he picked up a little scrap of newspaper. It must have been about 1 inch by 1 inch. He asked me, “What’s this newspaper?” I couldn’t believe he knew it was from a newspaper.
That morning, Jeremy suffered a loss…the death of his computer hardrive. Considering that he hadn’t backed up his files in the past month, this was not an insignificant occurrence. The event still haunts him, as he tries to figure out a good next step in terms of trying to recover his data. Argh.After Jeremy got back from dropping off his computer in the afternoon, I headed to the city center to walk around and check out a museum. I peeked in St. George’s Cathedral, where, in September 1986, Desmond Tutu pounded on the doors, symbolically demanding to be enthroned as South Africa’s first black archbishop. Three years later, he led 30,000 people from the cathedral to the City Hall, where he announced, “We are the rainbow people!” The church is interesting more for its history than for its grand interior design. Its stone exterior is quite nice.
I walked around Greenmarket Square and the surrounding streets before heading over to the Slave Lodge Museum. Built in 1679 for the Dutch East India Company (the largest single slave owner on the Cape), the Slave Lodge housed roughly 1,000 slaves in horrific conditions. It also became the Cape’s main brothel, its doors opened for one hour every night. Ironically, the Lodge became the Supreme Court in 1810, remaining so until 1914. The museum is being renovated, but the storyboards, audio clips, and other pictorial representations of slave life at the Lodge, in addition to a very interesting exhibition on the life and death of Stephen Biko (an anti-apartheid activist and founder of the Black Consciousness Movement who died while in police custody in the late 1970s), kept me engrossed for almost two hours.
Seeing slavery through the eyes of a mother, listening to stories of mothers having their kids ripped away from them to be sold to someone else, was just crushing. I obviously can’t imagine this life on any real level; the degree to which I can actually comprehend such a life rocks me like the Northridge earthquake of 1993. Massive. Although I associate the Afrikaans language with slavery and apartheid and all things evil, I think others who were personally affected by apartheid may not do the same. Sharia in the Bo-Kaap seemed to feel differently about the language. Developed in the late 18th century, Afrikaans is a local Dutch-based Creole language, a combination of many languages from the many people who have come to live in South Africa over the last two hundred years or so. The reason for the language’s development seems to be fundamentally problematic though, given that it was (at least initially) developed so the Dutch and the slaves could communicate with each other.
That night, Dom, Rob, and Charlotte came over for dinner. It was a gorgeous night, so we left the doors open and enjoyed the ocean breeze. After Jonah had gone to bed, Jeremy spotted an owl sitting on our balcony railing. We’d never seen an owl in the wild that close. It was amazing. It just sat there and looked around, until it saw us moving the curtains. We were watching from inside, through the sliding glass doors. It looked over at us, and then it took off with its wings slowly flapping, so beautiful.
On Tuesday, Jonah and I went over to Dom and Rob’s house in the morning. We played there for a bit, before Dom, Charlotte, and the two of us went to Deer Creek Park. This is the great park with the café that opens out onto it. Jonah and Charlotte roamed through different parts of the park for the most part, Jonah happy to play on another merry-go-round. Together, they did “ride” on these crazy looking plastic dogs that the café lets kids take outside. These things cost 3000 Rand (about $350)!
Jonah took a good nap that afternoon. When he woke up, he said to Jeremy and me, “Get in my bed!” So Jeremy and I climbed in; it was a tight squeeze. I don’t think this is what people mean when referring to a communal bed.Wednesday was such a gorgeous day. There was little wind, the sky was clear, and the air was warm. It was the perfect day to head up Table Mountain, the top of which I’d not been to before because the aerial tram was closed when I was here last with Jeremy, my mom, and Rachel. We didn’t let Jonah know where we were going until we called to confirm that the tram was running because the last time we tried to go up, only to find out the tram wasn’t running, Jonah was not a happy camper. He asked about the aerial tram for the rest of the day. One thing I’ve learned for sure about Jonah, and perhaps this is true of most kids, it’s not easy for him to let go of an idea you plant in his head, when it’s something he’s looking forward to especially.
If Wednesday had been a summer day, the line to get on the tram would have been a mile long. Instead, there were three people ahead of us. We got our tickets, walked up the stairs, and within two minutes boarded the tram. Jonah enjoyed the ride, although he thought it was too short. It only took about five minutes to zip up to the top.
Once on Table Mountain, we put Jonah in the back carrier on Jeremy and off we went. We’d bought him a flattened souvenir coin with an image of Table Mountain, hoping this would keep him preoccupied for a little while. No go. Raisins worked for a bit of time. (Oh, yeah, he now loves raisins and is keen on apples. Keen, a word I never used before befriending Dom.) He otherwise wanted to go back inside the little shelter area at the top so that he could push the buttons on the ATM and phone card machines. He really is a buttons guy.The views of the ocean, coast, and city below were absolutely stunning.
And the temperature was so warm! The pathways were pleasantly empty for the most part, save for a handful of tourists and students. There was a little coin-operated bus in the waiting area for the return trip to the bottom. Jonah happily turned the steering wheel, while telling me to get in the back (which I did). A quick zip back to the bottom, home for lunch, and a nice nap for Jonah.
On Thursday, the weather turned, so an indoor activity was a must. Jeremy dropped Jonah and me at Plinka Plonka, where we met Dom and Charlotte. Jeremy took Doris out for the day to run various errands related to her eventual transition into an assisted living home. Jonah mixed up his time more, playing on the structure for a while, sliding into the balls, digging in the sand, climbing onto a platform, driving around cars, cooking in the kitchen, and dressing up. The dress-up area didn’t have anything really designed for a boy, so I had Jonah choose between a pink skirt and blue tutu. The blue tutu it was. I think he liked the word “tutu” and the feel of the fabric. He walked around in the tutu, pretended to drive cars in the tutu, told me he wanted to take the tutu home. After about thirty minutes when I asked him if he wanted to take it off, he gave me a very definite, “No.” It did eventually come off so he could more easily climb up the slide.And today…today we were supposed to leave for the weekend with Dom, Rob, and Charlotte to go to Franschhoek (another wine valley). Dom’s dad owns a hotel with separate chalets out there, and we were going to spend the weekend in one of the chalets. Turns out the woman who does the booking hadn’t told Dom that the entire place was being used by some corporation for the weekend. Bummer! We only found out this morning, after I’d pretty much packed us all up. Looks like we may go for a night on Sunday to the farm house Dom’s dad owns in Franschhoek instead. We can’t use the farm house before Sunday because another family member has dibs.
This morning, Jonah and I ended up meeting Dom and Charlotte at the beach, Clifton Beach #4 again. The air was crisp, but the beach was a great place to be because damp sand sure beats damp grass at a park. Jonah ran around, asked to go in the water, built castles in the sand, played with the beach’s resident cat, and got us both covered in sand. Although the weather started off cold and wet this morning, it has turned into an absolutely glorious day!The weather this weekend is forecasted to be mixed sun and rain. Who knows what we’ll end up doing tomorrow. Perhaps if it’s nice we’ll take a day trip somewhere, or perhaps we’ll go to the organic farm nearby, or who knows. And Sunday we’ll hopefully head out to Franschhoek for the day and night.
And now to Jonah… Jonah is even more interactive and far more self-initiated than he was a month ago. In the car we’ll be driving along, and he’ll pipe up from the back, “Turn on music in the car.” The other weekend Bob’s daughter Julia said to Jonah, “I’m three years old.” Jonah replied, “I’m two years.” In the past we’ve had to ask questions of Jonah to set up the responses that we know he knows, but now he initiates conversations more on new topics and responds to questions or comments made by others. While playing with his stacking cups one day, Jonah counted from one to ten without any help and without any prompting.He’s had some great things to say over the past couple of weeks. It’s amazing how much Jonah picks up from us, files away in his head, and pulls out—sometimes at what seem to be the oddest time. Here’s a taste:
“I want open this little bit,” as Jonah proceeded to unlock and open the sliding door in our bedroom. “Get some air,” he said to me. I’m often telling him that we’re going to keep the windows open in the car so that we can get some fresh air inside.
While we were sitting at the table finishing our lunch, I explained to Jonah that next we were going to pick a book, get his milk, and go right to sleep. (He had woken up at 3:45 am after all!) Jonah said, “Mommy, sing ‘Ba-ba back sheep, ha’ you any wool, yes sir, three bag full’.”
After his nap, Jonah was sitting in his bed. I came in wearing my pajama pants, having just woken up from a nap myself. When I walked in, he said, “No, mommy, no.” He didn’t like that I was in my pajama pants. He did it a couple of days before too. I’m not sure if he thinks he has to stay in bed because I’m “ready for bed” or what his concern is about.“What’s that?” Jonah asked Jeremy, while looking at Jeremy in his sport coat on the day Jeremy was going to the University of Cape Town to give a talk. “Take it off,” Jonah said. Okay, so he doesn’t like when daddy gets dressed up either.
On Doris’s birthday, Jeremy asked Jonah, “What are we going to do today?” Jonah replied, “Pick up Granny Doris and going to eat.” He knows this as our Granny Doris routine.
Looking out the door of our bedroom into the entryway, Jonah said, “Lala’s shoes out there. Those fancy shoes.”
On the morning we were going to Boulder’s Beach, I said to Jonah, “We’re going to see the penguins at the beach today.” “No penguins at the beach,” Jonah replied. “Where are they?” I asked. “At the museum!” I think he was thinking of the aquarium, where we saw some penguins a couple of weeks ago.
As we were getting ready to get in the car and I was collecting some things to bring, Jonah said to me, “Take my books in the car. This one,” as Jonah handed me his photo album. “Grandpa too,” the picture of my dad on the back cover.As we drove by the mosque near Guguletu, Jonah said, “Imam sings at the top.”
Driving in the car on the way to Hermanus, we passed the Hottentots mountains. Jonah apparently liked the name because, when pretending to talk on Malala’s cell phone later, he said, “Hello Hottentot? High chair? Bye bye.” The high chair part was from when I called the restaurant while we were in the car to make a reservation and asked whether they had a high chair.
“Open the gate, Lala!” Jonah instructed Malala when we got back to our place. (There’s a chain that blocks off the parking space in front of our place.)
“Turn off the lights, daddy!” “Turn left.” “[Fill in the blank]!” These are the types of backseat driving comments we hear from Jonah on a daily basis. The other day, while Jeremy and I were making up a song and singing it in the car, Jonah said, "Mommy, turn radio on."
“Daddy gave me this business card from a box,” Jonah told me, as he showed me Jeremy’s Stanford business card.
"Want some coffee. Tend I drink coffee with my mouth, mommy," Jonah said to me. "Tend" is short for "pretend".
“Mommia!” or “Daddia!”—these are his names for us when he’s calling out to us.
“My hair is funny!” Jonah said, as he looked at his reflection in a metal pot, only to see his hair sticking straight up in the back.
While passing some road workers on our way into the city center, Jonah called out from the back seat, “Hi guys! I said ‘hi’ to those guys. I know those guys.” And then after we passed them, “Where’d them go?”“Get up, daddy! I want to see mommy,” Jonah said to Jeremy as they sat on Jonah’s “bus” and Jonah heard the shower water stop. (Jonah needs Jeremy to open the door to the bathroom because the doorknob is so high up.)
“It’s funny, daddy. It’s funny. Car under my neck,” Jonah said to Jeremy at breakfast one morning, as he tucked his little car under his chin.
“Mommy, go back to your bed. Daddy, go in other room.” I think we heard this after a nap one day. Dang, this little guy can be bossy!
While passing the mosque on the turn off to Guguletu, Jonah said, “When they pray, they turn on the imam.”
“Want to wear my froggy shirt,” Jonah said, as he does almost every day. This is the one piece of clothing he has a very definite opinion about, and the opinion is very positive. He’s shown no interest in any other article of clothing, one way or the other. He does ask to wear his gorilla shoes (his indoor, soft-soled shoes). So perhaps it’s that he likes clothes with animals on them. That could be it.
“This girl has a hand that turns the steering wheel,” Jonah informed us one morning, as he was playing with a little figure and his trash truck.
“Dom’s bed is cool,” a line that threw me for a loop one night as Jonah and I sat in bed talking before he went to sleep. Then I remembered… The day before, when we were at Dom’s house, Jonah wanted to check out the upstairs part of their house. While upstairs, I called down to Dom, “Wow, your bedroom is so cool.” (I liked the funky, distressed wood furniture.) Jonah pulled this one way out of his basket of memories.“I’m younger,” Jonah said at the dinner table one night, the day after we’d been to the park, where I’d told him he could climb on a particular structure when he got older.
“Mommy, save that worm,” he directed me, as we watched a little worm on the wall outside our front door. He often sees me escorting bugs of various sorts outside, and I guess I do explain to Jonah that I’m saving them by putting them back in nature.
“Safta has a nose. I’m going to touch her nose. I’m going to honk her nose. I’m going to eat her nose.” Jonah explained this all to me this morning, after pretending to drive to Safta’s house to sleep over.
“What is your diaper for?” Jeremy asked Jonah. “For when I go potty in my tushy,” Jonah replied. “Do mommy and daddy have a diaper?” Jeremy asked. “No,” Jonah replied. “What do mommy and daddy use?” Jeremy asked. “A paper towel,” Jonah replied. (By “paper towel”, I think Jonah meant toilet paper.)
“Where are Nana and Papa?” asked Jeremy. “At Kabira…with Prakash,” replied Jonah.
“Hello, Charlotte and Dom? We’re at home. Getting my shoes on and go outside. Bye bye, Dom.” This was one of Jonah’s many pretend cell phone conversations.
Pointing to the baboon in his Mama Voted for Obama book, he said, “This peed out.” I immediately started laughing hysterically, which made Jonah laugh hysterically. Then he pointed to the baboon and said, “That guy peed out!” This, Jonah has picked up from Jeremy’s and my morning conversations about whether Jonah peed out of his diaper at night and, therefore, needs a new onesie by the morning.
Picture descriptions: Jonah being adorable at Doris's birthday lunch; enjoying the penguins; an afternoon walk by our flat (do you love the look on Jonah's face?); digging in the sand; sunset by our house; Jonah watching the train at Mouille Point; hanging out with Dom and Charlotte at Mouille Point; fabulous sunset from our balcony; enjoying a morning coffee at Paranga in Camps Bay; Camps Bay Park; Jonah walking around, watching the Philani weavers at work; hanging out with weavers; checking out the weaving looms; riding the cars with Charlotte at Plinka Plonka; storefronts on Long Street; riding around with Granny Doris at V&A Waterfront; lunch at V&A Waterfront; enjoying Hermanus with Malala; Granny Doris admiring her candle and cheesecake; Granny Doris's 75th birthday lunch; St. James beach; penguins at Boulders Beach; Jonah and Charlotte roaming around Clifton Beach; happily cooking at Plinka Plonka; the streets of Bo-Kaap neighborhood; same; admiring the cars in Stellenbosch; wine farm in Stellenbosch; clouds covering Table Mountain in Kirstenbosch National Botanical Gardens; golf cart excursion in the gardens; view from the Constantia Uitsig Country Hotel; Sea Point Promenade; same; riding the dogs with Charlotte at Deer Creek Park; playing in Jonah's crib; family photo on top of Table Mountain; cable car up Table Mountain; Jeremy and Jonah on Table Mountain with Camps Bay on the coast in the background; Jonah happily in his tutu at Plinka Plonka; building houses at Clifton Beach; adorable Jonah at Doris's birthday lunch; Jonah driving his bus/train with Meow kitty cat as his passenger; enjoying his boda boda on the balcony; our sweet little man; walking around the grounds of Constantia Uitsig Country Hotel.
